What we can learn from narcissists | Keith Campbell | TEDxUGA

What we can learn from narcissists | Keith Campbell | TEDxUGA


Translator: berat güven
Reviewer: Peter van de Ven “Narcissism” is a word a lot like love: we use it, we talk about it,
we don’t really know what it means, and we never know
if the person we’re talking to has the same definition
in mind that we do. And narcissism is particularly complicated because of its strange history
in Greek and Roman mythology. It comes from the story
of a guy named Narcissus, who is this attractive young man who wandered the woods
looking for the ideal partner, he had many suitors he rejected, the most famous being Echo,
who repeated everything he said. Eventually, Narcissus stumbled
and saw himself in a pool of water. He immediately fell in love
with his reflection and froze. He died there. And in this place a flower grew, a daylily which today
we call the narcissus. The term “narcissism,” or self-love,
came to psychology in a couple ways. It was first used by somebody
named Havelock Ellis, who was a British sexologist who talked about self-love in a very
sort of graphic and physical way – that I won’t talk about. (Laughter) But then, Sigmund Freud borrowed
the term and used it in several ways. He talked about this sort of
fundamental love or self-esteem that a child would have
for him or herself. Our connection or our attachment
to our own ambitions, he even talked about it
as something linked to leadership. Today in psychology, we use the term
“narcissism” in three different ways or to describe three different
forms of narcissism, and this is where a lot
of the confusion comes from. When most of you think about narcissism, you are probably thinking about
what we call grandiose narcissism. This is somebody
with an inflated self-concept, maybe a bolder sort of personality, somebody who might be
charismatic or extroverted, but also somebody who might be callous,
have a strong sense of entitlement, maybe manipulative or well into,
you know, use or hurt people. When you think about
sort of the classic narcissistic actor, you know, politician or leader, you are probably thinking
about grandiose narcissism. The second form of narcissism,
which most of you probably don’t think of unless you are in the clinical
psychology business, is vulnerable narcissism. These are folks that have
some of that same sense of entitlement and the same sense of self-focus,
but are relatively shy, and in fact, they can be anxious,
have low self-esteem and be hypersensitive to criticism. So we talk about these sometimes
as covert narcissists because they are hard to spot,
you don’t really see them out there. Sometimes, we talk about them as
shy narcissists because they are shy; sometimes as basement narcissists, as in living in your mom’s basement,
spending all your time on the internet and wishing you got the attention
that you so rightly deserved while being too scared
to go outside and meet people. Finally, both of these forms of narcissism
are personality traits, meaning we all sort of vary on them,
we all have some level of both of these, and you can be both
grandiose and vulnerable, but the challenge with narcissism,
or one of the challenges, is if you become so narcissistic that it sort of pervades
all aspects of your life, it can lead to some real problems. So, imagine you go to work,
and you are like: “Everybody suck up to me,
high-five! I am awesome.” You might get away with that,
but then at home, you are like: “Hey kids, daddy is awesome.
High-five daddy!” And then, you are like, “Hey, honey!
You want to hear about how awesome I am?” If you do that and you
can’t really control it, it can damage your love relationships,
damage your performance at work, and eventually be diagnosed
as a clinical disorder, a narcissistic personality disorder,
which is the third form of narcissism. And this is relatively rare, we are talking about one or two percent
of the population at any one time. So when you talk about narcissism today,
when I talk about it today, I want want to talk mostly
about the grandiose form because this is generally what we think
about when we talk about narcissism, it’s what we have most of the research on, and also grandiose narcissism has some
real benefits as well as costs in life. Most of us think of narcissism
as something bad; nobody is like, “Hey, I am a narcissist!” or “Hey, meet my new boyfriend.
He is really narcissistic!” (Laughter) You know, it is generally
considered sort of pejorative, but in the case of grandiosity,
it can really help. So, grandiose narcissists
are really good at starting relationships. You go to a bar
and somebody approaches you and they seem really
confident and charismatic – Red flag! You know. (Laughter) But these same people, once they are
in relationships, have problems because they are more likely to cheat, more likely to be a little manipulative, they are more likely to be controlling. Same thing with leadership. Grandiosity is really good
for becoming a leader whether in an organization or in politics. The problem is once you are
in that leadership role, people who are narcissistic
take big risks, they do things to get attention, they have ethical challenges or problems
that end up bringing them down. One place where we see this benefit
of narcissism most clearly is in media and especially social media. We’ve done about ten years of research
on narcissism and social media, and what we have find is:
it sort of works. People who are narcissistic
have more friends or followers or links in social media. They tend to be more active. They take more selfies. They take more selfies
with their whole body, not just their face. (Laughter) They do that. They do very well in media, and if you think about
social media without narcissism, it would be kind of lame. I mean, it would be like cat videos and – (Laughter) Somebody saying, like,
“Hey Keith, how are you doing, bro?” and you are like, “Fine,” and that’s it. (Laughter) And where this really struck me –
I was teaching a seminar on narcissism, and like most of my classes, the students were watching
their phones the whole time, and so I walked over
to one of the students as I wanted to see
what she was looking at, and it was Kylie Jenner,
one of the Kardashian gals, driving a Ferrari in Los Angeles. And it kind of blew me away. One, because she wasn’t doing anything,
she was just driving a Ferrari. And then I thought about it,
and I thought, “Oh, my God. She is a genius!” She basically disintermediated
the entire media structure in society. So, in the old days, if you wanted to do
the Kylie Jenner reality show, you needed to get a bunch of people, and have some scripts
or at least a producer, and have grips and best boys
and all those things you don’t know what they mean
at the end of a movie, and then you’d put it together,
and you send it to a network, and the network will distribute it
to everybody else, to your fans. Kylie got rid of all that. She just got on her phone,
filmed herself, sent it right to her fans, which is just amazing,
it’s an amazing change. And so you might say,
“Well, gee, that’s a little shallow”; I mean, it’s not the most
important thing in the world. But others have used this
to really positive ends. So, a recent application of this was the ice bucket challenge, which probably you are aware of
or even participated with. And the idea was
to raise money and awareness for ALS, or Lou Gehrig’s disease, which is really a terrible,
debilitating illness. And the idea was you had to give money, or you had to dump a bucket
of ice water on your head or have your friend do it or whatever. And this really worked with narcissism because, like,
who else is wanting to do this? “Hey, look! Check me out,
I got my ice bucket, it’s great!” It is not just narcissism, it is also fun. I think I did it with my kids, you know,
“Hey, dump water on dad.” It got a lot of people involved, but narcissism
was an important piece of it, and it really worked. So, there are ways we can use
some of this narcissism to very positive outcomes
or very positive ends. I am not the first person to figure out that in the modern
economic or social world a little bit of narcissism helps, but I think we need to have
a careful balance. So right now we have mentors
and teachers or professors like myself telling kids “Hey, you have
got to be a thought leader. You have got to build your brand.” Yeah, maybe, but maybe,
you know, have some thoughts, and at the end of that,
you can be a thought leader. (Laughter) You know, maybe build your reputation, like “I am a good person
who does good work,” and then focus on the brand
and the turtleneck and everything. So I think there is
sort of a process we can use. And where this really struck me was, my daughter was in kindergarden, and one of her teachers gave her
this “all about me” assignment. And the idea was
“write your special talent.” So she was at home, and she said,
“Well, daddy, what is my special talent?” I said, “Yeah, I don’t know.
I don’t have a special talent.” And my wife said,
“I don’t have a special talent.” I said, “Why, the only kid
I have ever met with a special talent was a two-year-old
reincarnated Lama in Tibet who blessed me with a Buddha statue,
which is pretty cool. But other than that,
most kids don’t have that.” So she wrote she was “nice,” which isn’t really special,
and it is not really a talent, but it’s still pretty important, you know. (Laughter) I mean, it’s better
than, like, “I am evil” or whatever. (Laughter) So, I felt good about that. I think the point is we can learn a lot from narcissism,
from understanding narcissism, from narcissistic
individuals in our lives, about what to do and what not to do. And what we can learn
is how to put ourselves out there, be assertive, don’t be afraid to dump a bucket ice
on your head for a good cause, to push yourself and build
sort of a broader social network than you might be comfortable doing. But what we can also learn is
how not to let our ego take over our life; we’re not the same thing as our ego. And in fact, I mean,
the best way I think about ego is it’s a tool in your tool box: you want to use it,
and then you want to put it away and go enjoy the rest of your life. Thank you very much. (Applause)

100 Replies to “What we can learn from narcissists | Keith Campbell | TEDxUGA”

  1. He speaks very matter-of-factly about narcissism. But to my understanding, he's spot on when he begins the talk describing the different types. The only time I've heard someone talk about the "shy narcissist", the correct meaning of a covert narcissist, as the proper term Sam Vaknin himself has created.

    That being said, I think the whole point of the talk was to determine the benefits of being a narcissist (the grandious type). Which explains why they are so prolific nowadays.

    At the end we find the conclusion to his speech: balance. Let us not be pathologically egotistical, and simply use our ego as a tool for every-day life so we can let our True Self shine through. It makes total sense to me. Don't know what people are getting so defensive about in the comments.

  2. He has not closely encountered a true narcissistic person. He is not qualified to speak. He wasted these people's time and the 5 min I watched before writing this post.

  3. A very shallow speech.. probably the title of it creates this disappointment.. it should have been something like “ social media and narcissistic traits”..
    But when he uses the diagnose narcissistic personality disorder, this speech is so very nonsense.. Anyone whose life has been affected by a narcissist, any one who has been through that torture will know that the only thing that can be learnt from a narcissist is to be able to understand what a narcissist is and run away from him..

  4. I just decided to cut ties with a narcissist because I was mentally drained. Let’s just say he didn’t take it well.

  5. I am sorry but really you are talking about assertive confidence not being narcissistic ! You obviously don’t know what it means!

  6. Sounds like he was given an assignment to speak on narcissism the night before. Dork needs to hem up his pants.

  7. I like how autistic kids use this word without knowing its true term..there is far difference between confidence and narcissim

  8. Gotta agree with other comments, this takes narcissism way too lightly. The impact of it on my own life is immeasurable, even though I was not the direct target. From the time I was very young, I recognized my aunt was not right and stayed away from her whenever we had contact. My mom and I lived outside of the country so most of the first 12 years of my life, but up until I was born, when my mom was 37, she lived in close proximity to the rest of the family. So a lot of the damage done to my mom was done before I was born. She is one of the most amazing people I've ever met (and I'm really not just saying that because she's my mom) and she comes off as very confident and happy but she not just zero self-esteem but negative self-esteem. The fact she raised me to have positive self-esteem is basically a freaking miracle, that's how little she has- and it is definitely because of her, because while my aunt is the most destructive, none of my aunts or uncles are mentally healthy, nor are my cousins now. I escaped the worst of the damage by being raised so far away during crucial formative years, though by no means did I escape it all. The biggest difference seems to be I turned my problems inwards whereas they all turned it towards other people. (For anyone thinking it's not possible to have postive self-esteem and still be affected by stuff like this and other mental illness, it is indeed possible, just apparently really, really uncommon) By the time we reestablished ourselves back near family, I was almost a teenager and finally able to recognize just how messed up things were. And, for the first time in her life my mom had someone to tell her that no, this wasn't normal or her fault, and I was willing to stand up to my aunt. The details would literally take a book (or several) to explain but I'll try to paraphrase the results.

    At the same time I was standing up to my aunt I also became sick with a rare disease that doctors told me I was in my head so my mom and I had to focus for 6 years before the correct diagnosis. Which wasn't even cured by the initial surgery and the rare disease is actually a spontaneous mutation that gave me a rare genetic disease that caused specific endocrine tumors that can (and have) reoccur at any time. Why is this relevant? Because my aunt, along with help from my paternal genetic contributor (who was very psychologically abusive to my mom) managed to convince very nearly everyone my mom has ever know (save my grandparents) that my mom has brainwashed me and has been making me sick for over 25 years. Despite medical proof and testimony that yes, 8 am sick and that no, I choose not to have contact with any relative, save my mom.

    Despite 20 years away from them, endless therapy and mental and emotional support, my mom is still one of the most damaged people I know. But again, the difference is she turns all the pain inwards (gee, I wonder where I learned it) because that is what a narcissist taught her she deserved. The scariest part, is from what I've read, pretty standard for what happens with narcissists. Oh sure, the specific details change, but not how they operate or the amount of sheer damage they do. I consider myself and my mom pretty lucky for breaking away because not everyone can. There's so much of an emphasis on "but FAAAAAMILY!" that people are pressured into not cutting these people out or their families off and are treated like bad people if they do!

    So yeah… narcissism is not to be taken lightly. I think what's going on today is a problem with people being self-absorbed which is not the same as being a narcissist.

  9. ok just finished this.. i was expecting an answer to what we can learn from narcs… a little anti climactic.. but good job any way.

  10. I have watched several of these TEDx Talks videos about narcissism and they really do play it down and present it as not too much of an issue.

    On reflection, and taking into consideration the whole nature of these videos making a sage out of human on the stage with the focus on him, I now understand why TEDx Talks would prefer to sweep the severity of the narcissistic epidemic under the carpet.

    Narcissists are hideous demonic vampires and the only thing we can learn from them is that monsters really do exist.

    Keep well away from them.

  11. I also was married to narc, do Not go to a therapist who acts like this guy..
    They make a Joke of. You're devastation.
    Asshats😏

  12. I survived a 33 year marriage to an extremely malignant narcissist. I'm lucky to be alive. It is a very serious, extremely dangerous and terribly sad mental disorder. I don't think genuine narcissism is anything to take lightly, or to want to aspire to. I think I do understand he means well, but true narcissism has no virtue, or admirable quality in it whatsoever.

  13. I think that this talk could and should have been built in a way more educational manner: I feel like these skills of narcissistic people that he talks about are only illusions, because they lead only to temporary benefits (see they are good at initiating relationships but not at maintaining them), and I think can be learnt from so many other better exemples of people than the narcissistic ones.
    Also it's really difficult taking selfies of the whole body, you know…

  14. I don't know how people think vulnerable narcissism is always attached with being shy vs. outgoing. Maybe it could be because it is more common? I've known someone who was more outgoing but they were absolutely a vulnerable type narcissist. The constant fishing for compliments and attention seeking was a major tell. Very weak ego that needed constant reinforcement. She was a very, very manipulative person.

  15. This is a bit disturbing to hear. It's unsettling how people, even when meaning well, are still enabling narcissism by raising its advantages.There're virtually none and even if it looks great at first or from a distance, you'll get hit by this difficult patterns sooner or later. Entitlement, grandiosity, lack of empathy, tendencies towards rage, manipulations, lies and many more. Yes, we should talk openly and without hatred about it and we should educate people about this issue but don't make them believe that narcissism can be used as enhancement of reality/relations of sorts. It's not and all it takes to see that is to read some comments here.
    Check dr Ramani Durvasula's work on narcissism, it was a game changer for me.

  16. I believe the numbers are off the only way we've 1% stat is because narcs answered questions. In my exp/ Liars etc …& How frightening Encouraging Narcissism to the little ones.
    TY:)

  17. This bloke is called Keith Campbell he is absolutely useless Anyone can set up a YouTube account and masquerade as an expert if that’s what they want to do. He has numerous vids claiming to be an expert. Fortunately from the comments he is only fooling himself.

  18. The NARC cannot take responsibility for their actions or maladaptive behavior ! They can be HIGHLY manipulative, also can constantly lie, are deceptive, at times sinister and when combined with Psychopathic tendencies…WATCH OUT ! Be very careful !

  19. My professor at UGA. Great guy and most of the people commenting don't realize there are multiple forms of narcissists. You all see to be mixing that up with a sociopath.

  20. Dr. Campbell did an excellent job of a quick overview of narcissism, especially in just 10 minutes. He's a excellent speaker and professor. I don't agree with most of the comments here. There are a lot of different types of narcissism, and Dr. Campbell views the subject objectively and with empathy.

    ** Edited for clarity

  21. I like how the comment section is confusing narcissism, npd, aspd and sociopathy all at the same time.

  22. Lol bunch of grandiose narcs leaving angry comments about how this guy isn't repeating their opinion on narcissism verbatim.

  23. this should be Xed off Ted Talks, not informative.accurate, nor a personal experience,.it is not innovative, inspiring,enlightening, useful or educational. This should be listed under sales strategies.

  24. My narcissistic alcoholic ex husband destroyed mine and my kids lives
    Yes it’s a very dangerous disorder that ruins people’s lives!!

  25. I almost died 2ce in my 20 years marriage with narcissist. There isn’t anything good to learn from them.

  26. I think this talk should be removed, as it is not discussing interactions with these destructive ':people".

  27. The speaker is very impressive. He doesn’t seem to have a single scar! That’s truly awesome. Now to place my ego back in the toolbox. ✌️

  28. Narcissism can be good if it’s controlled and used in a good way 🤷🏽‍♂️ and people here are saying their partners were this and that 🤦🏽‍♂️

  29. " relatively rare ? " . . . . " 1 or 2 % " of the population ? First of all, that HAS to be wrong, just based on all the views and likes on all these kinds of videos (most people are watching these videos because they are looking for answers, not just " curious " ) and, also, we have NO IDEA how much of the population this effects because narcissists don't go in for treatment !!

  30. You guys in the comments are talking about narcissism by the term 'selfishness' when I was thinking it in terms of 'excessive interest in ones physical appearance'.

  31. Devil's advocate…..???

    Are you playing it down ….
    Thats like saing what we can learn from a sociopath…really ?

  32. He got up there and just started making jokes about narcissists. Why do 99% of these people get up there and start acting like a stand up comedian? Tedtalks is for educational purposes. It's not entertainment. 1 out of 10 for this dude.

  33. I think a few are missing the point here. He's not quantifying levels of narcissistic behaviour merely pointing out that we all have the capability of being one but a small dose of it can be helpful as in the ice bucket challenge which got loads of people communicating with others. Id hope the vast majority of people are aware how horrible life can be beside pure narcissism and the effect in can have on others but I think the guy was pointing out something relevant. Each to their own I suppose.

  34. I can't watch this video until the end because he said that a narcissus is a day lily which means he didn't even get that right 🙁 🙁

  35. I think the hypersensitiv narcissism description is not the same diagnose as the grandiose narcissism. In both cases the individual aims at holding on to a reality construct, but the hypersensitiv does not always have grandiose beliefs about themselves, only convictions of spiritual truths, which experience the standard of regular selfishness and elevated vanity as very toxic. There is no common language.

  36. It is not rare. The majority of our population have become this because we are being socially engineered, which no one seems to understand.

  37. This guy is wrong on a lot of his points….let him go thru a "relationshit" with one and then talk about it…totally different story!!

  38. Ted talk once again successfully being superficial and failing to get to the true nature of a problem.

  39. I think another a good way to rephrase the argument that "well need a bit of narcissism in our lives" is not to call it narcissism at all, but say "there's a healthy percentage seeking validation". Everyone loves being complimented, doing good things for others to make good bonds, and being Narcissistic does in fact get you places in your career and life, is sadly a game we have to play cautiously. None deserves to be a doormat or a human sacrifice.
    Narcissism as many scholars and psychologist argue is so hard to track down because is such an inconsistent phenomenon that the only consistency is the same result; people feeling confused, angry and in despair. Because we can't fully track it down we can't really make simple and easy to understand examples of it that feel precise. I hear the argument that Social media is to blame at the moment (which is a solid point) but that model of behavior cant fully applied to all Narcissistic people. I have experienced people that are quite empathic and still use it and people that show be quite Narcissistic yet they don't indulge in traditional social media presence yet they seek validation in more straight forward ways like work and relationships. You see how strange that feels? We can consider social media a training camp for Narcissism and yet disconnecting doesn't keep us safe from developing Narcissistic tendencies or meeting Narcissistic people in the present moment.

    Another example is Narcissistic people never seek psychological help because they feel they are so grandiose. I try not to fixate on that trait too much because I believe that Narcissists have mental health too, because they can't act remorseful to their victims or recognize they have a grandiose ego. The isolation and people running away constantly might make them overtime anxious and depressed which might lead to treatment because their sickness is too bothersome. This doesn't mean they will get diagnosed with Narcissistic traits they will get treated for depression and anxiety and there is where the data gets murky by psychologists informing that NPD is very rare.

    The only assertive point that I can advise to people is just to BE VERY CAREFUL, offline, online, with family, friends, lovers, co-workers. All suspicions of someone being a Narc are valid, yet taking action over the matter is something you have to really walk on your toes and if you're absolutely convinced… LEAVE AND SAVE YOURSELF!!!! but quietly.

  40. Very cruel people, they get pleasure out if hurting others. Leaning on sadistic. Get away from this relationship.

  41. ok our society tells us we should love and be proud of ourselves,then when we do they say we are narcist uhaha.

  42. I honestly thought this was going to be a crash course on "how to get the f&@k out of a toxic relationship real fast". This speaker is a joke

  43. A narcissist recently excited my life, I kind of knew the red flags already but I chose to ignore them because of my love for them, but now everything makes sense, they were manipulative, insecure and could not accept criticism, even more they’d use their looks to get what they wanted, glad that’s no more, stay aware from narcs!

  44. I am a Narcissist. Everyone should beware of me. I will destroy you and make you feel like its your fault.

  45. I was raised by one and i only recently found out that everything she told me about her life was a lie. My mom blood mother. Everything. All lies and fabricated tales.

  46. I’ve been around narcissistic people for 14 years… didn’t even realize how much of a toll it took on my mental health until a couple months ago. But I’ve learned to survive with it and I know I should cut them out of my life but I can’t. I guess I’ve just learned to live with it. And I’m still surviving with it, people have told me to wait and hopefully things will change but I’ve been let down so many times that I know better not to hope for things anymore.

  47. To the commenters:
    Stop diagnosing abusers with personality disorders.
    I will never call the people who abused me narcissists, sociopaths or psychopaths. The very idea of it makes the part of me which loves to study various fields of psychology and neuroscience cringe. It corrupts terms(yes, even when done by researchers) which can have important meanings for people dealing with a stigmatised personality disorder, often resulting from their own trauma, who want help.
    I still feel like a fraud talking about my past. There were very few trustworthy people in my life growing up, whether family, peers or strangers in town. And that's why I know not to diagnose. Those people didn't do it because of disability, they did it because I was an easy target, a weird autistic kid likely with other mental illnesses.
    We shouldn't try to diagnose anyone but ourselves without expert knowledge and doing so according to the high standards required for that knowledge. Sometimes people are abusive, and while there may be explanations of their behaviour based on environment and history, plenty are also choosing to hurt people who they have dehumanised. That's the case for every soldier in war. Dehumanisation of others allows people to do monstrous things, however cozy or terrible their upbringing was.
    A lot of people say recovery from NPD is impossible, that no one seeks treatment. But it is the people who suffer from their behaviour who are diagnosed as such, not the people who only make others suffer, so by definition the ones labelled narcissists who hurt but never seek help are more likely to be choosing to abuse. Of course psychology is more complicated when it comes to helping people suffering from poverty and prejudice, but the point stands.

  48. I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later…

  49. I am so late to the game. This comment section is infinitely better than the TED Talk.

    I know a card-carrying narcissist or two and the Ted Talk just fell short. I don't know who the gentleman is talking about, but he gets a thumbs-down from me

  50. Nothing.
    Not a DAMN thing.
    There is ZERO to learn from them. Monsters. Run and dont stick around long enough to TRY learning.

  51. I like his statement at the end, " Ego is a tool you used then put it away in your tool box when your done & go on with the rest of your days."

  52. A word is enough for the wise and It is also important to apply wisdom when dealing with our partners. I got help from cyberhackinggenius as he helped cloned my cheating wife’s phone and I got access to all her phone text messages and social media chats without touching her phone. All I did was share my wife’s phone number with Cyberhackinggenius. I was able to read her recent and deleted messages from my phone without laying my hands on her phone and she has no idea her phone has been cloned. I discovered that my wife has been in a long term affair outside our marriage with so many proofs. You can contact this great Hacker Gavin via Gmail (cyberhackinggenius) or text and speak to him directly on his phone and WhatsApp : +19256795146

  53. This guy is a nut case. A narc is nothing but a manipulative, dishonest, individual. who almost ruined my life. Thank God she cheated and left me with nothing. At least i got out alive.

  54. Please make a video in which you speak directly to the Narcissists themselves, and offer your suggestions, techniques, strategies, therapies, etc., that they might utilize to heal, emiliorate, soften, diminish, de-weaponize, etc., their dysfunctional and hurtful behaviors. I thank you in advance.

  55. I was set up by my boyfriend who is a narc I was in love or I really have pity for him convert are the worse I think you was jealous of I knew there was something wrong I couldn't put my finger I just learned what narcissist this year I have to learn to forgive myself I thought I could help him I'm a empath no and codependent; he hurt me badly almost beyond recognition but I'm a child of God I will love again I'm not broken and I will still help people if I can I am; stronger and more aware awoke because of no him l love him I have no regrets

  56. I understand now the word narcissist comes from weak minded societal driven people who can’t think for themselves so they have to put a label on someone else who has their own mind and thinks for themselves does not follow societies rules and regulations on how things should be, He’s completely independent in their actions and their views. Does not need societal validation, etc so the guy named Narcissist was a guy who is completely in love with the fact that he’s confident self-assured and does not need the opinions of others so weak minded people call narcissist what they are because they essentially want to be like that But are too afraid to because they are so fixed our societal views and what people think of them lmAo then I love being a narcissistic person

    “ narcissistic personality disorder” in other words I envy the person who can think for themselves and has their own views. I’m intimidated by that because it affects me personally and a little glimmer of confidence that I have the person takes away from me, so he or she the bad guy

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